The Better Late Than Never Blog

Summer 2010

2010-09-19T20:27:00.011-05:00

My summer was filled with special times (and challenging times too of course) with my boys and very little else. I think in years past this may have bothered me some but somewhere in the last year I seem to have finally settled into being a parent and a stay at home mom. Yeah, I know, it only took me 4.5 years right? All I know is that I'm very happy! I think this recent facebook status of mine sums it up...

There are many things in life that I thought I'd be, but I'm not. And there are many things in life that I never thought I'd be, but I am.

Yet the reality is that I am happy and am loved (and that I love) more deeply than I ever could have imagined.

I love my boys so much and enjoy spending time with them and learning new things about them each day. Jack and Joey are so drastically different from each other, it does make things interesting. I also think that a big factor in my recent surge of happiness and peace is related to my parents moving to town. They are now just 20 minutes away instead of 5 hours away. They frequently come up for lunch with me and the boys a couple times a week and usually come on the weekend to babysit the boys for a couple hours so John and I can reintroduce ourselves to each other over breakfast or lunch. I know getting to see them so often has really helped decrease the isolation I have felt in the past from being a full time stay at home mom. And it has been wonderful to see their relationships with each of the boys continue to grow.

Here's a picture of us celebrating my dad's birthday with "little grandma and grandpa" this summer:

Anyway it was a wonderful summer where we did a whole lot of wonderful nuthin' together. The one big thing we did do as a family was go up to my aunt's cabin in July with my parents and my aunt. Despite the fact that there wasn't any AC in our cabin with 90 degree weather we still had a great time.

Here's some photos from the trip:

Nothing quite like playing with big brother's toys.

One of the highlights of the trip for Jack was frog catching... or chasing... or unfortunately sometimes clunking. (And yes those are dragon wings taped to the back of Jack's shirt in the picture above...and yes ironically enough the shirt is an ACDC shirt.)

And to a one year old, most anything is an adventure.

The boys had fun but clearly they were thrilled to be back home again... John included :)

It was a great trip and Jack and I will be going back to the cabin this week on our own with my parents. I'm excited for our first Jackie-Mommy only trip. I know we will miss Joey and John/ daddy, as they will us, but we will create some wonderful memories with my parents... and hopefully not freeze!
Here are a few snapshots of the rest of our summer:

Early in June we celebrated Joey's 1st Birthday. It was low key for many reasons but still lots of fun.

Joey started walking everywhere in June and has been going non-stop since, usually with a crazy smile on his face. And it seems like when he isn't walking he's climbing something dangerous!
I'm sure one of the highlights for the boys was when the workers came to remove the diseased Elm tree from our backyard. They parked themselves by the back patio window for hours!

We also went to the amusement park at Mall of America. Jack is really looking forward to hitting the height requirement to go on the next level of rides which includes a big roller coaster.

And we went to the MN Zoo a couple times. Once I was adventurous and went on my own with the boys... we survived :) Here they are in the play area in a big "nest".

But much of our summer was simply spent by almost daily walks to the local store for a donut or muffin and viewing of the local construction site a well as lots of backyard adventures.

And constant exclamations by Jack of "Nooo Joooeeeey!!!!"

As summer winds down and we spend more time in doors, this has become the most recent brother activity. Between their rough play together and Joey's propensity for climbing anything and everything, I'm sure Fall/Winter 2010 will probably include a trip to urgent care at some point!

My life is quite simple but filled with so much love. It amazes me how being a stay at home mom can be so mind numbing and yet so challenging to the core! But I love being home with my boys (most days) and wouldn't trade it for the world.

Jack's Birthday Celebration(s)

2010-05-30T20:29:00.012-05:00

In case you didn't see my last entry (way below the millions of pictures), I changed the title of my blog to The Better Late Than Never Blog. Yeah, this is one of the reasons why the title fits so well. I am just now sharing Jack's birthday celebration pictures. So here goes:

We had presents and cake with just us on Jack's birthday and a big friends party the following Saturday. Here's a picture of my big beautiful 4 year old with his token (you'll see why later) birthday cake on the day of his birthday. I love that sweet smile!

And here he is pigging out on cake. Much of the time he just eats the frosting... of course.

And here's the birthday boy getting in a before bed wrestle with his little brother.

And here's the Jack on the day of his birthday celebration with his friends. I think the hat lasted all of about 2 minutes. We had 6 friends over for his birthday - 3 boys from school (Ben, Will and Nathaniel) and 3 girls we regularly have playdates with (Teagan and then 2 sisters, Angela and Leah). We were a bit worried about it being chaotic with 7 kids running around and expected at least a couple of meltdowns but it went very well (despite me having to tell one child that we don't say "what the hell!" in our house :) and we had ZERO meltdowns! Honestly, I most expected one from my own emotional child but it was a fun tear-free day.

We had my friend Lori make Jack a crocodile cake because he's been pretty obsessed with crocodiles much of 2010. The cake she made was AMAZING! I love Jack's expression here (as well as throughout the party) when we had him come see the cake for the first time. It's that special little smile and giggle you get when he is so genuinely excited and surprised about something.

The opening of presents was utter chaos of course. But Jack got some wonderful presents from all his little friends.

The kids thought the cake was really amazing. Jack was a pretty disappointed because I carved up the tail and wouldn't let him eat the crocodile's head right away. We had family coming over the next day for a small celebration so I wanted to save it till then. Again I love his expression here - pure excitement and wonder!

With preschoolers it's kind of hard to think of what to do with them at a party. They are a bit young for most party games (not to mention it's asking for a Jackie-meltdown) and Jack's birthday is March so going outside is tough. So we thought of to blow up a ton of balloons (OK 72 balloons and John blew all of them up but one) and put them in the basement with the gift boxes. It was a bit hard to come up with a theme around a crocodile so we did somewhat of a pirate theme. Here is Jack leading his friends down to all the balloons.

They had tons of fun just running around kicking and batting the balloons up into the air. It was a good way to get out some energy :)

Gradually they discovered the gift boxes sitting on the trunk with a big stuffed crocodile "guarding" them.

Eventually one of the kids (probably the oldest, Angela) got the idea to push a bunch of the balloons into the little closed off hallway off the family room so they could really be in a "room" filled with balloons. This is where many of the kids spent the next 45 minutes.

Jack got the idea to collect bunches of the balloons in a big box and then dump them into the little enclosed space all at once. He was quite intent on his job :)

But would still join in the fun once the space was filled again.

I love this picture and I love these girls! The 3 girls had a great time together. Good thing too since 2 of them have separately talked of marrying Jack or having him as their boyfriend, so things could have been kind of awkward.

Oh my sweet Jackie! I'm so glad you had a wonderful birthday celebration. You are such a special boy and worth celebrating!

Changing my blog name

2010-05-29T19:58:00.006-05:00

Well as I've finally started to work on the blog entry about Jack's birthday, which was over 2 months ago, I've decided to change the name of my blog. Every entry I do is much later than I intend and there are a dozen blog entries in between there that never get written. So I'm changing my blog name to The Better Late Than Never Blog. It really described my blog style. Maybe it will help me give myself more grace and just write when I can rather than feel guilty about not recording things in a more timely manner. And in reality as Loving the Simple Life described my life pretty accurately, so does Better Late than Never. I've started (and restarted) many things in my life rather late. I got married in my thirties and started having kids in my mid-thirties. Got my masters around then too, which also changed my career focus. Well technically my career focus right now is being a stay at home mom and not loosing my mind at the same time so I suppose even with my new career direction on hold it will be another "better late than never" kind of thing. I plan to hopefully resume working when Joey is preschool age. Anyway, I introduce to you The Better Late Than Never Blog.

(And for my own personal historical purpose I'm going to include here the original description of my blog when it was titled Loving the Simple Life. It still fits but this new name seems to fit better right now :) -
Loving the Simple Life - I'm Mary Jo or MJ. As my blog title states, I'm loving the simple life. I mean it isn't always overtly simple but I'm loving the "simple" things in my life like being a stay at home mom, my fun intense son Jack, my sweet sweet smiley baby Joey and my rock of a husband John. I've realized that the difficult things I've gone through in life, the not so simple times in my life, have caused me to appreciate times like this. So this is me, just loving the simple life.

A Bedtime Story: How I became a mommy

2010-05-09T21:09:00.004-05:00

I thought for Mother's Day it would be fun to share the bedtime story, a true story, that I tell Jackie every night. He curls up in my lap in his bed and I tell this story: (all italicized words are usually said by Jack)

Once upon a time there was a man names John and a woman named Mary Jo and there last name was stinky pot of water! (or some other made up word) Well, they met and fell in love and decided to get married. After a while they decided they wanted to have a family so they got a little tiny baby in mommy's tummy. That baby grew bigger and bigger and bigger until he was ready to come out and live with mommy and daddy.

They went to the hospital and after a while ppbbt out came the baby and the baby cried waah! The dr. said "It's a boy!"

And mommy said "Give me my Baby Jack!" And they put Baby Jack on mommy's chest and she covered him with a blanket. Mommy snuggled that baby, looked at him and knew he would be her little boy forever and ever.

Mommy and new Baby Jack stayed that way for a long time until the nurse came in and said "We need to take that baby and put a diaper and some clothes on him." But when they pulled the blanket back and picked up the baby they found that the baby had POOPED ALL OVER HIS MOMMY! Icky poopy!

But that mommy said "Oh that stinky baby, but he's my baby and I'll always love him no matter what."

So mommy and daddy took that stinky baby Jack home. After a while he grew bigger and bigger and soon began to walk and talk and run around and kick a ball. Baby Jack became a big boy so mommy and daddy thought he might like to have a little baby brother so they got another little tiny baby in mommy's tummy.

That baby grew bigger and bigger until he was so big in mommy's tummy that Jack could hardly fit on her lap anymore. Finally, he was so big it was time for him to come out and live with mommy, daddy and Jack. Little grandma and grandpa came to stay with Jack and mommy and daddy went to the hospital to have the baby. After a while ppbbt out came the baby and the baby cried waah! And mommy said "Give me my baby Joey!"

So they set that Baby Joey on mommy's chest but before they could cover him up he PEE-PEED ALL OVER HIS MOMMY! And mommy said "Oh my stinky boys! The first baby pooped on me (insert Jackie sound affects) and the second one peed on me (sound affects again) but I still love my stinky boys and I always will no matter what!"

THE END

Remembering

2010-04-14T14:00:00.001-05:00

Joey is growing up too fast. Jack is too. I mean because Joey's a baby I notice it more obviously and yet I swear each time I go to re-tuck Jack into bed in the middle of the night after feeding Joey I'm shocked at how big Jack has become. Some how having a second child makes your children grow up faster... or at least you notice it more often.

Now, almost every time when I feed Joey and he falls asleep in my arms for nap time or bedtime I get all mushy -sentimental and usually a little sad. Sometimes a lot sad with a twist of happy if that's possible. He's just not much of a little baby any more. I look over at Jack and he's not a baby at all. Well OK when he whines and throws a fit it's like he's a baby still but he's more big boy than baby. But when I hold Joey asleep in my arms, nuzzled against my chest, my heart melts...I tear up. I want to make this moment last forever. At least I want to remember it forever. But now that this is the second time I've gone through this, I know I won't. You remember images and pictures and all but not the essence of it. Not the make-your-heart-melt essence of holding your sleeping baby. Kissing their check before you lay them in bed. Wanting to stop time and just breathe them in.

I remember when Jack was an infant and was having various struggles with him... basically not liking the baby stage and wanting him to grow up, some people would say to me "oh they all grow up too fast..." or "oh they are babies for such a short time..." Well, for some reason I didn't believe it then. I didn't feel it then. But now I do. Oh my how I do, for both of my boys. I want to stop time and just be here, now, with them.

Oh the things they say...

2010-01-30T11:00:00.001-06:00

I know I've been totally MIA on my blog. Such is life I guess... busy busy! Anyway, I did want to record and share a few of my favorite things that have been said recently the past month or so.

Too Smart!

I was really struggling with Jack in the weeks before Christmas. Just a lot of defiance, not listening, back talking, etc. Well after a long spout of it as we were trying to get out of the house I finally said to him, "Jack I'm concerned because Santa doesn't bring presents to kids who don't listen and I'm worried that you aren't listening very well lately." His response without missing a beat was... "Well Santa doesn't bring presents to mommy's who yell either!" I actually had to ask him to repeat himself I was so surprised! My friend Melody suggested that I start saving money now because law school is expensive.

Young at Heart

The BEST thing I heard all of last year, other than the healthy arrival of Baby Joey, was the wonderful news that my parents want to move out here. It's amazing news and we are so excited! This winter we've begun the process of shopping for a townhome for them (John calls it my part-time job). Well after one of the 1st big trips out here to see a number of properties we were discussing the issue of stairs or no stairs, split level vs. one level, etc. and the reality of what fits in their price range and what doesn't. I had been trying to encourage them to consider one level townhomes but it means giving up some space and other things that they are use to. Some of what I was saying finally started to sink in when my dad said he'd had an aha! moment early one morning. He said he realized he can buy a home for 5 years with stairs and probably need to move or buy a home long term for like 10 years. Then he said "Because, well in 10 years I'll be old! I'll be 88 years old then!" I love that he doesn't think 78 is old :)

Don't Ask!

We went in to get professional photos before Christmas at Kiddie Kandids (now bankrupt!). We wanted a family photo and a brothers photo as Christmas presents for people. Jack had been real patient (for a 3.5 year old) but was getting a bit spent. We were trying to get some more brothers shots with Joey sitting on his lap on the ground. The photographer had adjusted and readjusted a wiggly Joey on Jack's lap several times. All of a sudden Jack started to fuss and look uncomfortable. She asked "Are you uncomfortable sweetie?" And Jack responded "Oowwwwoohhh my p.e.n.i.s is big and it hurts!" The poor woman looked like she was going to fall over! LOL life with boys... this.... is... my... life! Seriously what is up with that THING? What the heck was God thinking? (OK I did just type out the P word funny... I really don't want to know what kind of visitors I'd get from google with that word spelled out normally and the word BIG next to it!)

I want in!

Well, technically Joey can't talk but I think this is what he's thinking in the picture below. Joey is pulling up to standing already. It's crazy in part because it seems really early and also because, not surprisingly, he has NO ability to hold himself up or balance so he's constantly falling over and smacking his big 'ole head! Anyway, Joey loves watching Jack play in the bath tub which inspired his first time pulling all the way up to standing vs. just on his knees. In this picture I'm pretty sure he's saying "I want in!" This was taken about 2 weeks ago and he's much more steady on his feet now as seen in the 2nd picture.... though if you look closely you can see a few marks on his head from recent adventures. We've all nicknamed him trouble!

Dis Day?!

The days leading up to Christmas and, just as importantly to Jack, "little grandma's" arrival, Jack would frequently ask to count the days down on the calendar. Time is such a hard concept for small children! Anyway, when Jack woke up on the day when my parents (little grandma and grandpa) were to arrive, I told Jack "Guess what! Little grandma and grandpa come later today!" And his response was exclaimed with such great excitement and disbelieve "This day?! Dis day?! They are coming dis day!!!" His excitement was just so fun to see. My mom and Jack have the most amazing relationship and connection. It's such a blessing to both of them as you can see from this picture below.

I'm sure there's more to share but that's what I've got for now! I'm know there will be many more fun little boy moments to share soon.... so many that it's hard to take time to write them down. But either way I feel so blessed to be surrounded by my men in all shapes and sizes (and honestly, 2 of them are growing up way way to fast these days!)

Wordless Wednesday

2009-11-25T18:47:00.004-06:00

I googled "OCD in Young Children" today...

2009-11-11T16:22:00.005-06:00

Well the title might give you an idea of what I'm struggling with here! (And nice 1st blog entry to do in over a month, huh?!) We have a great month or so with Jack and then all of a sudden he's extremely emotional and, well, crazy! I guess 3 year olds are just like that in general sometimes and then you add in the fact that he's super emotional and kind of a control freak and it makes for a mess. And the fact that I'm emotional and a bit of a control freak too doesn't help I'm sure.
Anyway he's hyper obsessive right now about all his characters in movies. When he watches one of his favorites he has to line up the characters perfectly for each scene. And I don't mean Woody needs to stand next to Slink the Dog (which is a tractor with a long trailer here...genius). I mean the snake and shark need to be in their perfect places too. What you say? There is a snake and a shark in Toy Story? Yep for about 30 seconds total. So Jack either has us stop the movie every 30 seconds (not happening) or cries and throws a fit that everyone isn't in their place. So needless to say a few movies have been put in time out for a while here... as well as Jack. I mean this is all funny when you aren't in the throws of it... and yet sometimes it's not. Sometimes it scares a momma.
I have seriously looked at him a few times lately and thought "What is wrong with him? He's psychotic?!" And then of course.... I wonder if he has OCD or something. Which he doesn't, not according to the description but man that kid is OBSESSED about things being just right! It has gotten a little bit better since we've put movies in time out and laid down the law more with it (as in throw a fit about something like this and you get put in your bed) but still it is sometimes scary. I'm sure (ok hope) that it's a combo of his intense temperament and him being just 3.
It's also the time where I need to remind myself about the benefits of him being such an intense and emotional child. For example I get these amazing hugs and I love yous all the time. It's so sweet to drop him off at school and have him run back to be before I leave to give me a big hug and say "I love you mommy" or his latest "You're the sweetest mommy." Or when I pick him up he comes running across the room like he hasn't seen me for days and does the same. And as far as his intensity goes, well he can get caught up in telling his stories and be focused on them on his own for over an hour... it's amazing to see how focused and independent he can be. I'm sure it will serve him well in adulthood... if he makes it there :)
So I'm reminding myself of these things and trying to not freak out about my son's constant freak outs right now. Yeah, we are just 2 peas in a pod aren't we? Actually make that 3 with our drooling happy companion, Joey, who is always entertained by whatever his brother does!

Sleepless in Seattle

2009-09-30T12:14:00.003-05:00

Well obviously I'm not in Seattle but still we are quite sleepless in this household. Well at least I am and Joey is too. (So excuse the rantings of a sleep deprived woman here...) Joey's been waking up every 3 hours to eat and sometimes even more frequently. He had been sleeping a 6-7 hour stretch each night but when he got close to 3 months (he'll be 4 months tomorrow) he started waking up more... and then even more 2 weeks ago and has kept it up since. Last night he was up 1.5 hours after going back down at 3am... then up again an hour later. He's been always eating a ton when he wakes up so I'm OK with that, the big boy needs to eat. BUT he's starting to wake up more and I'm just not OK with that! I have flash backs to the days Jack woke up almost every hour after his 1st 4 hour stretch for no apparent reason. But Joey isn't Jack and I need to remind myself of that. He's a million times more mellow and I'm a 100 times less freaked about everything.... then again I'm also 10 times more tired and spent taking care of a baby and a busy bossy intense 3.5 year old at the same time. But hey I keep reminding myself this is the last time I'll be doing this since Joey is our last baby. That and I think he must be teething... he tries to gnaw his fingers off or your fingers off every chance he gets. We go in for his 4 month appt. tomorrow so maybe I'll know more then, but probably not :) since there is no magical answer with some babies.

Anyway I was also going to say there was another reason I thought of Sleepless in Seattle and wanted to blog about it. We had a really hard couple of months with Jack right after his 3rd birthday, then the past 2 months it's been sooo much easier - almost no meltdowns, less bossy, more flexible (which any thing is an improvement in flexibility for him), etc. Well about 1.5 weeks ago (just before he turned 3.5) it flared up again. I swear we now have at least one meltdown a day. And me being so tired I'm having them too -or at least not handling Jack's meltdowns all that well all the time.

Well the other day he HAD to have a certain toy/ character to watch a movie with (an almost identical but smaller replacement wouldn't do) so we looked all over... well 15 minutes later we still didn't find it, were not willing to look any longer and his time to watch the movie before dinner was running out. Dad and I both tried to explain to him that because he was being difficult, not flexible, and not willing to use a replacement toy it was almost time for dinner and there was little time left to watch the movie. Of course he spiraled into a meltdown (he was 1/2 way there) and through the tears and tantrum we hear "I don't wanna be difficult! I don't wanna be difficult!" LOL which later reminded me of a movie scene with Meg Ryan crying saying "I'm difficult, yes I'm difficult..." in relation to why some relationship didn't work. It was done in the same pitiful sad blubbering tone as Jack's "difficult" rant.

So anyway I thought, oh I can do a Sleepless in Seattle post and wrap that into it. Here I am typing it up and realize in my poor sleep deprived state that, well duh, that Meg Ryan scene was from When Harry Met Sally not Sleepless. Sigh... well I'll just use this rambling entry as proof of my mushy brain and post this anyway.

Wacky Wordless Wednesday

2009-08-19T10:40:00.009-05:00

Sorry I have to make 2 quick comments (leave it to me to not be wordless) -yes, I'm growing perverted tomatoes and no, that is not Joey with the monkey but one of my old favorite pictures of Jack).

Tired Tuesday

2009-08-11T10:30:00.011-05:00

Well, yes I'm tired (I mean duh, I have 2 month old and a 3 year old) and it's Tuesday but that's not why I'm calling this blog post Tired Tuesday. I wanted to share some fun sleeping pictures and memories!

First you gotta start with a good yawn, complements of Joey -

And then look at sleep positions...these 2 pictures just happened to be side by side in my camera. And if I snuck in and took a picture of their daddy late at night I'd most likely get the same shot (I get poked with those elbows regularly!)

And then of course the infamous picture of Jack creatively falling asleep mid-story telling during quiet time. Yes, that is a stool on his head and he IS hugging a bus... you can just imagine the story line! He must have had to stop a moment to think of the next scene when he dozed off.

Since Jack doesn't nap very often any more we do quiet time instead of nap time where he brings toys into his bed - usually various characters from a favorite movie and he recreates it in dramatic, loud (there by negating the idea of quiet time but oh well) detail scene by scene.... and no my son does NOT watch to much tv! LOL)

One of the sweetest sleep things lately for me is that Joey loves to fall asleep propped up on my chest. Here's Joey, not even 2 weeks old yet asleep on me.

I love when he does this! I think part of why I love it so much is that I remind myself (even in the middle of the night, OK especially in the middle of the night) that Joey is my last baby, that I will never hold a baby so small that is mine again. And the other reason I love propping him up and snuggling him, asleep or not, is that Jack would never let us do this. Seriously, when you'd prop him up to burp him as a baby he'd start kicking and squirming like crazy, basically climbing you. So we had to burp him like this...

And because when I dug up this picture of Jack I was shocked, again, at how much my boys look/ed alike as babies... I had to stray from the topic and share one of Joey at about the same age from a couple days ago.

Wordless Wednesday (ok, almost Thursday)

2009-07-29T20:44:00.006-05:00

Joey's birth story... finally.

2009-07-25T16:58:00.023-05:00

Our family is complete!

Joseph Robert Bellinger
Born June 1st 1:08pm
7lb. 1oz – 19.5 inches long

Well here is Joey's long time coming birth story. The 1st is a brief (well for me) narrative of his birth that I wrote up a couple days after he was born. The 2nd is a more detailed timeline version. Yeah, kind of annoying and redundant to post 2 versions but it is more for record keeping sake for me than anything else :)

June 1st 6am was my induction. (My Dr. and I had decided on an induction because my platelet count had dipped too low to have an epidural if I wanted one so several days before my induction I took prednisone to boost my platelet count to an acceptable range.) I arrived at the hospital at 6am but they didn't start pit till 8am. Joey was born at 1:08pm after 12 minutes of pushing. (Amazing compared to my 3.5 hours of pushing with Jackie.) My platelet count had dropped back down to 108 despite the prednisone (from 130 the week before) but at least it was over 100 so I was OK for an epi, but it proved to me how important it was that I was on the meds and planned everything this way even though they made me a bit crazy... I can't imagine how low my count could have gone without the meds.

As planned I did get an epi around 10:45am but worked hard on not pushing the button that gives out measured doses too much -I wanted to feel the contractions some especially when it came to pushing. Well it was perfect! I could tell when I was going from 7-10 cm because it was much more painful but it didn't last real long before the dr. had me start pushing. Again I felt a quite a bit of pain but it really helped me push. It was the perfect balance of manageable but useful pain. Baby Joey - Joseph Robert - was born at 1:08pm - 7lb 1oz, 19.5 inches with a lovely shock of dark hair -like his daddy, like I was hoping :-) We plan on calling him Joey until he tells us not too :-)

I just can't express how perfect this whole L&D was for me. I had such a difficult 1st birth with Jack with so many things that didn't go right, that I feel I missed out on or could have been done differently... but this one was so wonderful. I feel so blessed that I got to experience this birth this way. I got to see his head coming out, the doc even had me help pull him out of me, and I got to cut the cord. This was my last delivery and now I feel like I didn't miss out on anything... I got to experience everything I didn't get to the 1st time. Really it couldn't have gone any better.

Detailed Timeline of Joey's Birth

6am arrive at the hospital for induction – Nurse #1 says dr. didn’t leave orders and they don’t call him till after 7am. New nurse comes on and trusts that I’m actually there to be induced.
7-8am – 1st nurse blows out my vein in the left hand trying to get in an IV. Gets it in the right hand. Lab guy who comes to test for my platelet count and can’t find a vein in the normal spot so does it in the middle of my forearm?! Still had a bruise 2 weeks later. Platelet count comes back at 108, 100 is the cut off for an epi. Surprised it is that low though because 6 days before it was 130 on prednisone (week before that it was 97 without it).
8:10am Pitocin started. Nurse continues to turn it up over the next 2 hours till contractions are 3 minutes a part.
10:10am 5cm dilated, dr. breaks my water. Works around baby’s head to press as much fluid out as possible to move things along quickly. He reports that baby Joey is in the posterior position but will hopefully turn to anterior soon. Epi is ordered.
10:30am Epi team arrives but struggle to get epi in. After putting it in and taking it out, then poking around quite a bit it is in and set by 11am. This process is the one of the post painful part of the delivery, sitting up bent over my stomach through contractions while they try to get the epi in my spine. John was a great help through out the delivery, holding my hand and encouraging me, but was most needed during this time.
11:30am Epi is going, still feel contractions some and am working to not push the button for more medicine. Epi is rather uneven so I’m propped up on my side with pillows to help even it out.
11:35am I’m trying to adjust the pillows and end up realizing one of the pillows is my butt! (as noted by John’s notes for my timeline “11:35am -ass pillow”.)
12:15pm Dr. Chow says I’m almost 7cm, baby has moved into the posterior position, and thinks should move along quickly.
12:30pm "things a hurtin” – let dr. know things are a lot more painful, definitely moving into the 8-10cm dilatation phase. Working hard on breathing through contractions.
12:55pm Pushing begins! Thinking “down, out and away” while pushing and looking up at Jackie’s birth picture in between pushing. Both these things really help. Epi is perfect – low enough for me to feel contractions but up enough that the pain is bearable with focused breathing.
1:08pm Baby Joey is born! I even got to see his head just sticking out of me. He was all purple looking. The Dr. had me stop pushing and suctioned him to get him to fuss/ cry a bit. Then he had me push his shoulders out and then the Dr. quickly said “Mary Jo give me your hands” and he grabbed my hands and had me grab Joey under his arms to help pull him the rest of the way out of me. It was the most amazing sensation! I also got to cut the cord.

I was crying tears of joy and saying Oh My God through the last part of the delivery. It was such an amazing experience. Everything I didn’t get to have the 1st time.
1:15pm Baby Joey pees on mom for the 1st time –right when they put him on me after cleaning him up before they had a chance to cover him up he peed. Jackie pooped on me right after birth so this was quite fitting.

Oh and I just have to giver proper due to my OB, Dr. Daniel Chow of Diamond Women's Center in Edina, MN (http://www.diamondobgyn.com/Physicians.cfm/pid:44/Daniel_Chow/index.html). His care was perfect throughout the delivery as well as the pregnancy. He's one of those doctors that has the perfect style of explaining things to you and helping you understand the situation. He even called me on Sunday once to give me test results. I mentioned that he was my dr. to someone in the health care industry recently and they said "oh, he's a rock star!" So true - I wish I could just see him for all my future medical needs. I even sent him a thank you card and I'm not one to send thank you cards.

I just feel so blessed to have my last labor and delivery happen the way it did, like I've experienced everything I ever wanted to in this area. What a way to finish!

Brothers

2009-07-02T14:24:00.007-05:00

My Jack is a bit of a maniac. He's very physical and often rather wild with an awful temper. His 1st reaction to frustration and anger is usually physical (hitting or throwing a toy), which is difficult but I work very hard with him on it (that's a whole other post... I believe his intensity will make him a powerful adult someday.. if I survive to see it :). With all that said I NEVER thought he would be so naturally loving and gentle with his little brother. He is just so sweet with him I can't believe it. He also wants him in the room with us all the time, which is a bit annoying at meal time when Joey is sleeping and I want him to stay that way so I can eat!

I also love seeing how Jack so proudly wants to show off his baby brother when we are in public. At school pick up time he has to show Joey to his teachers or any random parent walking by. If they stick around long enough after the initial introduction he'll say... "And look at baby Joey's cute little feet!"... or yittle peet (he definitely has a thing for Joey's feet... but of course Jack will then refer to his own feet and say "And I have cute little feet too!") He is also quite amazed that Joey has no teeth... or teeff. It is wonderful to see how much Jack is fond of Joey already. Of course that will probably change some when Joey is mobile and interested in Jack's toys. Jack is very very possessive (another separate post). But in the mean time it is so sweet it melts my heart daily.

And Joey continues to love hearing Jack play and tell his stories. Near his big brother is clearly Joey's favorite place to be when he is alert. If Joey is fussy, Jack's noisy ramblings will calm him down and perk him up, which makes me almost which Jack was awake for Joey's late night gassy screams. In fact, yesterday I had Joey in my lap (just finished breastfeeding him) and Jack and I were sitting on the couch talking. When Joey finished eating I propped him up in my arms so he could take in what Jack was saying, and Joey smiled! I knew Joey's 1st smile would some how have to involve his big brother. And on his 1 month birthday. I would guess most of Joey's "firsts" will be somehow connected to his big brother Jack.

Favorite moment...

2009-06-04T19:55:00.007-05:00

Baby Joey is here! I need to do a full blog on his arrival and all but in the mean time I have some moments to record. I don't want to let my perfectionistic ways stop me from recording these moments even though it means they will all horribly be out of order -as in coming before the birth story and blog announcing Joey's arrival.

So here is my favorite moment from today... well despite my semi-comatose state I have many favorite moments from today but here is one I wanted to record and share. Baby Joey has these long alert phases and what he wants to do the most during these times is hang out with the family and listen and watch. It's amazing. I'm in the other room with him where it is quiet, maybe talking to him some or holding him, and he gets fussy. We wander into the bathroom where Jack and daddy are having a rowdy loud bath time and Joey perks right up and focuses in on everything going on. At dinner he's not content sitting in his vibrating seat with his paci, but he wants to sit in daddy's arms propped up so he can hear and see (as much as the little guy can) what's going on. He knows all these sounds from the past several months.... he already loves the sound of his big brother playing loud and being silly. He loves when daddy talks to him and tells him sarcastic little anecdotes. He arrives and his part in the family has already been carved out in his little heart.

My Baby...

2009-05-28T21:21:00.004-05:00

OK, sorry, not THAT baby yet, but my 1st baby. Seriously I don’t know if it’s just hormones or knowing that a real baby will be arriving soon, but I’m just overwhelmed these days at how grown up my 1st baby really is. I feel a bit ambushed. I mean I look at him and just can’t believe he is such a little big boy now. Oh don’t get me wrong, we are having those 3 year old moments too that remind parents very clearly how NOT grown up these little people are, but who he is now just shocks me sometimes.

I spend my day with someone that is such a real person all of a sudden, such a personality. He has always been such a highly emotional child which has brought many challenges, but now it’s like I’m getting the benefits too at a new level. The special hugs, touches, I love you’s throughout the day and I missed you “berry much” after only 2.5 hours of preschool. And overall I feel like a switch has turned on – a switch where he shares his thoughts, musings, observations, opinions (not just in a yelling 3 year old way either), and emotions at such a new level… I just feel blessed and amazed at who he is, who he is becoming every day. OK and I’m probably hormonal and very pregnantly aware of how it will all change shortly when my 2nd baby arrives any day now. Oh, I’m going to let Jackie grow-up as he wants to and needs to but he will always be my 1st baby, my 1st “best buddy”. Of course I’ll let him grow up because it is so abundantly clear to me that this is my absolute favorite age so far. But now suddenly when I go in and check on him at night before I go to bed, straighten him out in his big boy bed so he isn't sideways or sleeping on top of 5 stuffed buddies, stroke his hair, give him a gentle kiss and then another, I look at him and it just pierces my heart –so sweet, so precious, so mine.

Procrastinating Perfectionist

2009-05-18T20:00:00.005-05:00

I know they sound contradictory, but they aren’t really. And it is what I am. I’ve written at least a dozen blog entries in my head (good ones too, but you’ll have to take my word on that) over the past few weeks. But alas I’m also as big as a house. Well OK probably not but I feel like it. And it is very difficult for me to sit at the computer (not a laptop) for more than 10 minutes without getting uncomfortable. And nesting… I’ve been doing a lot of nesting which apparently for me does not entail keeping my blog up to date despite many things to write about.

So back to my being a procrastinating perfectionist, first, I’m kind of a perfectionist. I’ve got the mindset of if you aren’t going to do it really well, don’t bother. Unfortunately quite often I feel like whatever I do is a reflection of me. So when I do something I really want to do it right… not half-assed. I hate half-assed. (And one of my flaws is that I have a hard time realizing that others are OK with half-assed). So because of this I sometimes end up wanting to do things, even starting things in my mind but not actually doing them because at that moment I just don’t have the time or energy to make them perfect… like they HAVE to be. So I procrastinate but then it only gets worse. I mean really to make the perfect blog entry at this point it would have to cover a lot of important stuff and at great length too! So then I procrastinate more. So I realized to get started blogging again I just needed to write about what has kept me from writing –the procrastinating perfectionist that I am. And swallow my perfectionistic pride and do a quick (ha-ha) highlight of some of the things going on. Excuse the lack of transitions… this isn’t going to be perfect.

Sleepover - Jack had his 1st sleepover without daddy or mommy! He stayed at grandmas and grandpas from Saturday morning to Sunday morning while John and I jetted off for a glamorous… Refresher Birth and Delivery course and a nice evening together. They took Jack to a farm where apparently Oscar the pig tried to eat his coat but grandpa saved him. They had a great time. It’s nice to know it went so smoothly in case they need to take him for a couple of days if I deliver early.

Ugliest Disease- Yeah, I know nice transition. One of the other blog entries I had written in my head was not fun and light. It is about the ugliest disease I know, that I’ve ever witnessed from a variety of angles. Alcoholism or Addiction. It steals so much. Not only the life of the addict but of those that love them, those that live in that awful conflict of recognizing it as a disease and yet an eventual choice… I have an extensive blog entry in my heart about this, one that will come out at some point. Heck I’ve got a whole book I want to write. But for now I just mention my cousin Joe H., whom I’m not all that close to, but is victim of, a participant with, this ugly disease called alcoholism to such a physically ravaging degree. Sometimes addiction ravages trust and relationships only for a while but with such an acute level of deception that it destroys so much unseen, so much under the surface beyond just the individual in the grips of addiction. Other times, it physically destroys the individual, like my cousin Joe. He’s had periods of sobriety over the last few years but now when he drinks he pukes blood within days. His skin turns yellow, his body shuts down. Currently, he is in the hospital with massive blood clots on both his legs and his lungs. He was put in a coma for a while to attempt to treat him. It seems likely that he has suffered a stroke. Obviously his prognosis is not good. He is in his mid 40’s and will likely die. There are many disease that kill, that cause great suffering, addiction is just one of the ugliest ones I’ve known personally. It affects so much that surrounds it. It is a disease, and yet it is a disease the people have a choice in, yet they don’t, and yet they do. That’s part of the ugly I think. Your prayers and thoughts for Joe and his family are appreciated.

Remodeling – (Yeah seriously there is no good way to transition here…) Our dining room remodel is done! It included the removal of a wall that separated it from the kitchen and the rest of the house, a small addition, ½ wall to create a mud room and a patio doors. We love it! I’m so glad we had it done. I’m even more glad that we decided to do just the dining room for now, as the original plan was to do the dining room and the kitchen. They’d still be here working on it if we had gone forward with that version and I’d be a crazy pregnant woman without a kitchen. Hopefully in a year we will be able to think about doing the kitchen as well…and even a bigger hope is that my ancient AWFUL electric cook top and stove don’t die in the mean time. The next blog entry I need to do (no promises though) is to upload some pictures of the before and after. Then again if baby Joey arrives before that, clearly he should get top billing before the remodel job. Speaking of which (oh a transition!)...

Baby Joey and Pregnancy- 14 more days till baby Joey arrives!... or less!? I’m 37 weeks today and have an induction planned for June 1st -2 weeks from today. Last Tuesday I was 1.5 cm dilated and my platelet count had surprisingly gone up to 107 from 105 when it normally goes down at this point in pregnancy. We’ll continue to test it weekly since I’m close to the mark (100) where they won’t allow you an epidural.

Otherwise, like I said I’m a nesting fool these days. Seriously why can’t they figure out how to manufacture this nesting instinct so I could use it at other times when I need to get a bunch of stuff done?! Then again I do love a deadline. With nesting it is hard to not overdue it at this point in pregnancy. For me I have a ton of energy one day and run around like a mad woman getting stuff done and then am wiped out the next day. Which is OK, since then I usually stop and recuperate. Sunday was more a recuperating day (though still entailed a walk with the boys to our favorite creek and a trip to BRU) because something has changed. I’m pretty sure I’d already dropped but I think baby Joey has really engaged his head down into my pelvis. I stood a lot Saturday (busy day cooking with friends) and when I woke up Sunday I swear the kid is a few inches lower and ½ hanging out of me. You previously pregnant women know what I’m talking about. Something has definitely changed –now when I have a contraction it’s more painful and I feel like they kid’s shoulders are pushed up against my pelvis! Or when he moves (which he does in the most hyper frenetic way) I swear he’s going to poke his way out.

Ah… the last few weeks of pregnancy. There really is no physical torture like it –at least none that I’ve experienced. Then again, this will be my last time experiencing pregnancy and this stage of torture so thinking about it ending makes me kind of sad. I’m not one that has easy pregnancies, not horrible, but not comfortable that’s for sure. But I really have tried to enjoy it and appreciate it more knowing it’s my last. I hope to take the same mindset and apply it to all the struggles of dealing with an infant (not the stage of parenting that comes natural to me!) I’ll miss the little maniac going crazy in my belly. I can’t wait to see what he’s like outside of the womb!

And for a great but brief (yes, I know what that is, just can’t do it myself) little sentiment on this matter specifically see http://heathertyfeatherty.blogspot.com/2009/05/16-days.html - a dear friend of mine’s blog. Her blog is hugely entertaining, full of wonderful crafty things and a great honesty so add it to your favorites when you are done. I stalk it every day to get my Heatherty Featherty fix.

A Little Person - oh yeah one more thing.... my little boy is a real person! Recently I've just been loving the time I spend with him. I know, I know I sound awful saying that, like I didn't love the time I spent with him before or that he wasn't a person before... But now it's like spending time with a little person, one who I can visit with at meals, that tells me how he feels, what he's thinking about and what he likes. And not just in grunting screaming toddler ways, but in sweet beautiful insightful 3 year old ways. I'm feeling the benefits (rather than just the challenges) of having an emotional and emotionally expressive child. I LOVE IT! More on this later I'm sure.

I’m sure there is more to write about (heck I just went back in and added the Little Person part). But this is good enough (deep breath) for now. Hope to write more soon and not just in my head this time!

Oh the things they say

2009-04-19T19:11:00.005-05:00

Sometimes the best things they say are things you over hear them say to someone else... you are allowed to laugh a little more and not required to hide your expression as much!

Daddy was just giving Jack a bath. He'd asked Jack to roll over on his tummy and swim so he could clean Jack's butt.
After some scrubbing and then splashing from Jack rolling back over and sitting up on his knees I hear -
Jack, in a mildly distressed voice: It's bigger daddy?! It's bigger?! Make it small again!
Daddy: Oh, well... it's OK they do that sometimes...
Jack, more distressed: Make it small again, make it small again! It's bigger?!
Daddy: It's OK hunny they do that sometimes... just think of... well something like baseball or grandma.
Mommy: Stifled laughter from the other room (not an easy thing to do 8 months pregnant).

Need I say anything more?

Hmm.... I'll have to do a post on this specific topic/ theme. There have been a few interesting quotes from the past that must be shared and recorded for future blackmail. Hey, he's a boy right? And we are having another one soon... we better just get use to it!

Telling Stories

2009-04-16T14:57:00.004-05:00

Jack is really into telling stories these days. Well, it is more like verbally and physically (with lots of props of course) re-enacting various movies. You can hear various lines from the movies, be informed of where he is at in the story, and get in big trouble if you disrupt the props as they are in play in the story. Oh and also be told "no mommy, not yet, I need to finish my story 1st!" It's so cute to see his imagination at play... (hmm speaking of which we didn't have a lion toy so he used a yellow block instead, per daddy's suggestion. I actually found a little bath tub cut out lion a couple days later and suggested he use that. He was quite disturbed at the possibility of 2 lions and that "no mommy this (holding said yellow block in my face) THIS is the lion." Did I mention that he's imaginative and yet quite set in his ways?)

Anyway, story time has been in full force lately. It's great because he'll just get caught up in it, no tv, and no interaction generally needed from adults. Well today I overheard the full version of the CARS movie... seriously he went on for 45 minutes doing his story, moving his props around, etc. And then Nemo... (glad he skips over that 1st scene, which last week when we watched the movie he did ask "Mommy what happened to that other fish? The mommy fish?") Anyway we had school today but the WHOLE time we were home he seriously just did stories... no tv all day! He did check in with me at one point to confirm a few lines from the Cars movie, LOL, but other than that he was caught up in his story world. LOVE IT! What a great day!

Hmm... well I think I'll also add a couple more things that happened today just to keep the record straight. Today I was told by Jack "No not your way, my way!" With his arms folded emphatically across his chest. (Not sure where he heard that from, honestly... though there have been a few other things said lately that sound familiar. Twice this week I've heard my lecture to him about "listening" spouted back at daddy later in the evening. I'm not sure who got a worse tongue lashing, Jack (in the AM by mommy) or daddy (in the PM) by Jackie. Either way it made me giggle in the kitchen when I heard daddy gettin' it...). And back to today, there was also a bit of a crying fit at the lunch table and as we were leaving the park (of course). But other than that... a really nice day. Oh and now... he's napping! YAY! A nap for the 1st time in over 5 days! I think Baby Joey and I will go join him.

What's in mommy's tummy?

2009-04-10T08:26:00.013-05:00

It's so cute when you ask Jack this question he says in a really excited voice "A baby!"
It's so hard to know how much a little guy (just 3 years old last month) understands about things like this. We talk about it a fair amount though. I explain that the baby needs to stay in mommy's tummy till he gets big enough to come live with us. We talk a little bit (OK well I talk, Jack listens) about what it will be like when the baby comes and what we can eventually do with the baby. Oh and he got this one on his own from observation....
Mommy: "So Jack, what do babies do?"
Jack: "Cwry."

I've wondered how much he gets or thinks about the baby coming. He has said a few surprising things that make me realize he is actually excited about the baby coming -or at least he has moments of excitement. I thought it best that I record a few of these.

The 1st one was a few months ago. Jack had been sick for a few days and we were very stuck at home in lovely the Minnesota winter. I'd purchased a new kid's movie one night so we'd have something new to watch together. That next morning when he woke up I went into his bedroom and said "Guess what Jackie? I have a surprise for you!"
Jack's response was "OH mommy, did the baby come!"
Oh it just melted my heart that in his mind the baby coming was a surprise to be excited about. And that it was what he thought of first.

Another one happened just a couple weeks ago, shortly after his 3rd birthday. Jack and I were driving back from visiting grandma and grandpa in South Dakota. I think we were just leaving McDonalds and I wanted to get his next dvd going before I safely got on the road. But something distracted him and he said "J for Jack mommy!"
I replied "Yes Jack, that's right - J- A- C- K! Jack!"
Then he asked me to spell Mommy, so I did, then Daddy, Grandma, and Grandpa. His interest level was impressive. So when we finished with those I said "OK hunny are you ready for a dvd?" (not wanting to drive into the Minnesota river while changing dvds in the player).
And he said "No Mommy! We have one more person!.... You forgot to spell BABY!"
Awww..... he thought of the baby as part of the family! Oh I love this age.

And then a small one this morning. It took us a while to come up with a name for this baby (Joey) but have been recently using it some... saying baby Joey. Previously we had asked Jack if we should name the baby Joey (or what we should name the baby) and he had said NO! And didn't really have any suggestions and in his usual way seemed irritated by the suggestions (sounds more like daddy here!) So the past couple of weeks we'd just been referring to the baby as baby Joey sometimes (but not all the time). Well this morning he and I were talking about when the baby comes (OK I was talking about it, Jack was maybe listening). I was saying something about all the baby, apparently too many words, and he misunderstood what I said (surprise!). Well he said "No mommy, he's named Baby Joey!" Awww... well I guess he's picked up on us calling the baby Baby Joey! Too cute!

Part of me gets excited about this stuff because Jack hasn't always been a big talker, so it's fun to see him so expressive and talkative about stuff (well, for him. And in all honesty the other day when I was getting sassed at repeatedly, I dreamed of the old days that he didn't talk!)

But really I get excited about this stuff because I hope that in some small way it prepares him for the baby actually coming... or he anticipates the big event a bit. I mean his world is going to be totally turned upside down. Of course we all know he has know idea what's coming! And in reality, me taking care of a newborn and an intense 3 year old who's use to having most of my attention, I haven't a clue what's coming either! What I do know is that our lives, yet again, will never be the same.... and I'm so thankful for that.

Jackie 2 years ago...

Last night in his big boy bed...

Hector Kitty

2009-04-06T16:16:00.006-05:00

Here is a picture of Hector, my kitty who recently passed away. He's giving some love to an elephant. A friend recently remind me that for a while I called him a cat dog because his personality was definitely not all cat. He was much more easy going, less self absorbed and self righteous than most cats. He didn't outright beg but he sure had the persistence of many begging dogs. He was quite silly, very sweet, and, well honestly a bit dense. When he was young he did many dorky silly "un-cat like" things. So in honor of Hector, I'll share a few stories...

He once was sitting in an the sill of an open window, probably watching a bird. Suddenly something startled him and he jumped... high enough to bang his head hard on the top of the window sill. Freaked out he went streaking from the room and ran right into my other cat... which only freaked him out further. My other cat (110% princess cat) just looked at him in disgust.... she practically shook her head and said "Hector you are a disgrace to the feline race!"

Another time he and my other kitty were chasing each other around the apartment. They both skidded to a stop right by me. My other kitty had slightly bumped a broom that was standing up against the wall, which Hector was just around the corner from. She and I both watched as the broom slooowly slid off the corner wall (while Hector intently watched us). The broom had been bumped perfectly so that the top of its handle landed smack on top of Hector's head causing him to jump 3 feet in the air -in that way only young agile cats can! He didn't even see it coming.

When I and my boyfriend at the time had decided to get Hector we were in the middle of moving so we bought him at the pet store but left him there for a couple weeks until he could be brought home (wow, OK that was almost 16 years ago!) I'd go visit Hector from time to time at the pet store. One time I stopped by he was in the kennel with a new batch of kittens. He had one of them cornered... not viciously, oh no, not my Hector kitty. He was desperately trying to bat a little fluffy ball to the cornered kitty. His efforts were only mildly successful and just managed to freak both of them out. Each time he'd try to pass the ball to the kitten s/he would hiss, causing Hector to jump up and hiss in that grunty way kittens do. This went on for quite some time. He was special.

Oh and a video! I'll attempt to attach a little 1 and a 1/2 minute video of Jack "chasing" Hector when he was 1st learning to walk with a push car. At first I felt bad that Hector was being "chased" but after a while it was clear that it was a fun game for him. As I said previously I feel bad about how his role in the family changed so much after Jack was born. We just didn't have much left to give Hector at the end of the day. But my Hector kitty, he was definitely still part of the family.

I no longer have the video but just a link to it on Photobucket so hopefully this will work. You might have to cut and paste it..... OK I'll have to try to get this to work later!

Oh the things they say

2009-04-05T18:46:00.006-05:00

I've got to write this down somewhere, I mean this is part of why I started a blog. All these funny wonderful things 3 year olds say you think you will remember forever but don't. Hmmm that gives me an idea for a regular blog entry... ya know something to actually get me blogging on a regular basis.

This one was with daddy when he and Jack went to McDonalds.
They arrived and were standing in line - Jack had already been over to visit the toy display. While they were in line Jack kept saying to daddy "Pirate daddy, I see a pirate." Daddy says, no Jack there's no pirate in the toy display (or, well actually it is more like daddy to just ignore Jack's random commentary.)
Fast forward about 5-10 minutes later... Jack and daddy are sitting and eating and daddy sees a man with a black eye patch walk by. Uh oh! Daddy figures this "pirate" was standing in line behind them and that is what Jack was trying to explain to daddy!

Sarcasm

2009-04-05T09:35:00.003-05:00

My husband's sense of humor is filled with sarcasm. I don't mind it, I've gotten use to it, heck I've come to expect it and enjoy it sometimes. It's usually not nasty sarcasm so it's OK. I mention this so that you know that I am quite familiar with sarcasm and can recognize it a mile away.

Well, apparently my blog life has a mind of its own... and it's sarcastic. I mean one day I create a blog called "Loving the Simple Life" and the next day all heck breaks loose! Sarcastic -or maybe it's more ironic... anyway. I mean still in the grand scheme of things and some of the things I've seen and lived with in my life, this "heck" that broke loose wasn't that bad. It wasn't that bad overall because I still had one of the corner stones of my "simple life" well in place supporting me - a loving stable (though sarcastic) husband. I've had the opposite kind of "support" in my life before and, well, it not only makes for not-so-fun complexities in seemingly simple everyday life activities, it also makes going through "heck" 10 times worse.

So I do love my simple life but in reality life still happens and often times it ain't so simple. I'm not a pessimist but I am human and sometimes it is hard not to worry and wonder about "what could go wrong." I see dear friends put through trials that when we were younger just happened "to other people." Having been through trials myself, I know these have a place in our lives and really do make us stronger... eventually. But when we are in them? In the worst most ugly part of them? The why and even the how of survival is inconceivable... and feels unacceptable. And for people who see their loved ones go through such trials, it also feels unacceptable. This "stuff", whatever it is, happens to "other" people, like people on TV, etc. but not to us. But it does happen... and it hurts.

Wow tangent! Anyway, I guess that's what blog journaling is sometimes- yes I love my simple life but overall life is not so simple all the time. I mean all the great planning and "perfect" decisions in the world sometimes still don't end up how we hoped. To quote my deceased, dirty Irish grandpa Jack "Once you think you get things figured out, God's going to change it on you anyway." I think having a great foundation -family, faith, and friends - is what helps us endure and hopefully, eventually prosper. I know it makes the world of difference for me. Sometimes I'm not so great at tapping into those resources in my life, but eventually I remember that they are there and figure out I can't do all this on my own without them.

So maybe that's enough philosophizing for now (you hope so don't you!?)... I mean I don't want to scare you off just after 2 posts. So here's a highlight of the past few weeks -

Lots of excessive unnecessary planning for my son's 3rd birthday and the 3 very small celebrations that went with it.
My dear sweet, but often neglected-after-Jack-arrived, Hector kitty fell very ill. After a couple days and over 10 hours of multiple vet and emergency animal hospital visits, most of which happened late at night, we made the decision to put sweet silly Hector to sleep. He was seriously the most kind, gentle and yes simple cat a family could have had. Over the past 3 years there were several times that Jack probably deserved a nasty scratch or nip from Hector, but he never once fought back against Jack's over enthusiasm about, well, everything. He was 16 years old so deciding to let Hector go wasn't so hard, but feeling guilty about not taking him in to the vet sooner or being more attentive to him over the past 3 years is often times heavy on my heart. Miss you Hector kitty!
Construction on our dining room remodel started -Jack and I went out of town for the 1st week of demolition. Of course all the Hector stuff happened leading up to this and then Jack got sick. I was spent beyond belief with late night pet hospital visits and lack of sleep worrying about Hector. But we trudged off to my parents house in South Dakota and we were both well taken care of. Jack had tons of fun with Grandma while I caught up on sleep. The 2nd trimester "honeymoon" is definitely over and has been replaced with 3rd trimester aches, pains and exhaustion. Anyway we had a wonderful time as usual at Grandma and Grandpa's house.
Oh yeah and I lost weight. I mean normally this is a great thing, something I'd been working on doing for a few years. But I suppose when you are pregnant it is not such a good thing - well, not good to loose a pound a week for 2 weeks in a row. Before that I had been gaining at a slow but steady acceptable rate for pregnancy. Hopefully it was just the stress of everything going on and will not continue -well at least not right now :) I already can't eat huge meals so eating in between meals is important. I do believe that I gained 3 lbs during the 4 days I was visiting my parents so I think I'll be OK!
And Jack turned 3. As a lot of my friends have attested to, some sort of switch is turned when your child turns 3 and they go a bit crazy. And apparently not just for a while, but for most of the year from age 3 to 4. Extra tantrums, bossiness, etc. -Jack's has mostly manifested itself in the form of crying sessions. They last anywhere between 10 minutes and 45 minutes and you can't rush them...."my still to sad mommy". They are the most fun when they happen as we are trying to get ready for preschool in the morning. Oh yeah -or when we planned a nice birthday dinner. Some friends say their previously "easy" child is now a nightmare. We've had a head start here I think, so it's been rough but, honestly, some things have been rough for a while with my emotional, overly physical, little guy!
Oh oh I thought of one more - Jackie is in his "new" bedroom (previously just his playroom) sleeping in his big boy bed! So far the transition has gone seamlessly. I expect there will be issues once he gets brave enough to get out of his BIG big boy bed on his own when he wakes up or in the middle of the night (it is kind of a big bed... he needs a step stool to climb into it!) John and I put a lot of work into making his "new" bedroom special (painting, fun wallies boarder that matches his bedspread, new bed, etc.)

Well that's the majority of what has gone on since I disappeared from my blog. I guess I might end up being "one of those" bloggers that only updates every few weeks. We'll see :) I think no matter what for a blog takes, it still has value. I'll try to add some pictures later (hopefully not 2 weeks later). Looking at the list, obviously the heck that broke loose here wasn't that bad other than poor Hector and all those dr. visits. Everything just happened at once, which is overwhelming especially to a 7 month prego like me.

Speaking of which... OMG I'm going to have another baby in just 2 months! I mean probably more like in 8 weeks! I'm feeling quite excited and sentimental about it (last pregnancy/ baby and all) and nervous mostly just about the transition for Jack and what that means for all of us. I better go organize some stuff or at least makes some lists... it makes life feel more simple and in control. Then again, a good nap can have the same affect sometimes too.

And so it begins...

2009-03-18T17:06:00.001-05:00

It seems that the beginning is the hardest. I mean you want to start out right, right? I've been wanting to start a blog for quite a while, but just haven't gotten down to it. Probably the perfectionist in me never finding the perfect time or the perfect single thing to start talking about... or the procrastinator in me. I mean there are so many OTHER things I could be and should be doing especially with baby number 2 (a boy -Joey) arriving in a couple more months, but here it is, finally (my blog friends say).

I figured this was a good day to start because it is the eve of my 1st child's birth. Jack's 3rd birthday is tomorrow. He's the light of my life and the biggest challenge of my life. Isn't that how it goes? That the best things in life are the most challenging? The most rewarding things in life are also sometimes the most painful? Speaking of painful, a few hours from now will mark the 3 year anniversary of when we went to the hospital to have Jack. We'll just say he started out challenging right away since he wasn't delivered till 6:30pm the next day.

This sort of brings me to the other reason I've been wanting to start a blog. I'm pregnant with my 2nd child due June 8th. I'm unbelievably excited about his arrival, really I am, though there are days where my almost-3 year old is all I can manage (or not manage) so the image of adding a baby to the mix is a bit terrifying or at a minimum exhausting. Which pregnancy right now is exhausting anyways sooooo I have a head start I guess. Anyway it would have been nice to have a blog as a pregnancy log early on, but well, better late than never. I am convinced the delivery of this next baby will be a breeze compared to Jack. Or at least that's what I'm telling myself. The Dr. said it most likely will since, ya know, the way has been paved (he used much more technical and graphic terms I won't subject you to). John (DH -or dear husband) and I joke that when it comes time I'll just grunt once and Joey will be here. That sound much better than the 3.5 hours of pushing that it took to bring Jack into our lives. Like I said he's a challenge, but has been so worth it. At least most days :) (No wait, I'll say "worth it at least most hours." When the day is at an end and the rewarding times and challenging times come to a close and weigh against each other, he is definitely worth it every day. Or maybe I'm just extra sentimental because it's his birthday tomorrow!)

Well one thing you'll learn about me if you follow my blog is that brevity is not my strong suit. I talk a lot. I write a lot. I explain a lot (heck 15 minutes ago this was shorter but I just went back and added a bunch of stuff). BUT because in the image of wanting to actually just get my blog going and not allow the perfectionist procrastinator to dominate any more I'm going to stop here. Just don't expect many, if any, future entries to be this short. And yes... this was short.
- Mary Jo